Saturday, January 16, 2010

HEAVY HEART...


2day am leaving home..ma heart feels heavy..i shared ma feeling with ma friend and this was his reply.."if u wish to have a good future then you have to depart"..yep i need ma future..what if i can go ahead and see ma future and come back???really wish to..i said goodbye to ma near and dear ones..went to ma ancestral home yesterday..missing ma happy moments spent there..the ponds,the greenaries and the old house and the kids creates a nostalgic nerve in me.. home sickness is a major issue for me...i still remember ma vacation course i joined for ma engineering entrance..the day ma mom left leaving me in the hostel..and the very next day i ended back in home telling excuse to the matron that ma grandma is seriously ill...ma mom and dad reminds me all those now...adieu ma world ..and ma new world..am comin yeah...watch out...

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

BAD ENDING...

Had a lil talk with ma junior friend Mr.O...we talked about photos,places and pulled each others leg and the whole talk was interesting..i asked him about his girl friend who broke up with him about 4 months back...and i just passed a joke on it as he pulled mine...duh...he got angry and violent...
                oops..i din mean to hurt him...but i know he got hurt cos of me...and i felt that am d most peaceful and composed person in the whole world when i saw his reaction...pyaar kya kucch nahi karaata???hmm...anyways what i did was wrong...i shouldnt have iriitated him ...hurt him just like that..i told him sorry and he was ok after a lil while again we went on talking about other things..but ma mind still clings on to him...am sorry yaar..i din mean to hurt u..4 giv me..

SLEEPY...


As i am jobless these days the only thing i find interesting is sleeping..and yup eating ..thats the most important part of ma life...so i can sum up ma life into 3 things now..
    SLEEPING             EATING           &&&                  AGAIN SLEEPING.....
                                                   And ma sleep at night is kinda disturbed these days ..i dont have any clue..may be drishti dosham as ma mom says...hehe...i think its the effect of  the scary movies i see before going to bed which keeps me awake at night..how do they picturise scary scenes ??hooo...hmmm.....yesterday as per preparations part 2 i went to coimbatore with ma dad...i dont have any idea how long we walked under the melting sun at noon through the busy vyshial street of coimbatore....
                                               and at night i could not feel ma legs as it was sprained ....and today i walked..and this walking doesnt seem so good for me..as it has hurt ma legs again.......and i am feeling sleepy now after ma typical vegeterian meal....

HATE uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.............



These days i hate those 2 words....1.KIDDISH
                                                                      2.MIND GAMES
                                                      Every where i go an find people they end up saying "oh gal u r kiddish.." and every where i hear this " he/she  is playing  mind games"..yuck..i hate these..even yesterday ma junior commented on me "gal u r such a kiddo!!!!!!!!" heh???after all i am 22..and yet every one says am kiddish.!!!!????.nothing irritates me more than this....and as reply i shout "heyy am matured gal as am 22"..and they say "c this proves that u r immatured and kiddish.."..oh ho i am struck then..

                                   and secondly mind games..threatening and black mailing..can everybody play mind games..if he /she doesnt like his/her behviour they end up tellin dat "he/she is playing mind games"..huh...if every thing could be termed as mind games where's the place for feelings????????no body is supposed to have feelings..everybody is playing mind games ...

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

REAL COUNTDOWN STARTS NOW...


there are only 3 days to go for ma destination... i will be in a new state,a new city,new room and new people...i can say a whole new world..the only question that i have for anyone from there is "how are you supposed to adjust?"..well they all answered " you might have difficulties in coping with city life..then gradually you catch up with the pace"..being  a mallu  and all free from the hurry burrys of a metro life  in ma life so far,i am sure that i might find it damn difficult to get absorbed into the phase of the new state and new city....well life goes on as ma friend says and u need to move with the waves....

TUESDAY 12TH JANUARY 2010 11.00 P.M


its rainin here....watchin the rain through ma window.. ...i can see the rain drops falling on the plantain leaf near ma window..i could hear the "creek creek " of grasshoppers and "croak croak " of frogs...huh..cool breeze is comin in...am breathing fresh air....i feel pain in ma legs cos i travelled alot today..and its after effects? i am having on ma knees...ouch..

Sunday, January 10, 2010

ANOTHER BORING SUNDAY..

Sundays had a special place in ma heart when i was in school and college...i used to wait for them..Saturdays and Sundays felt like heaven for me where i could be on ma own leaving all the academic tortures and hurdles behind..just lay back,wake up late,have food if u wish to and when you wish to and watch TV the whole day and sleep only after midnight....
                                        After college when i joined ma job,Saturday was off for me..so eagerly waited for Saturdays to come..now that i have left that job,am not waiting for any day now and everyday seems like yesterday or every other day..

                            today  is Sunday..and something special is happening in ma house 2day..but am very happy away from those happenings in front of ma system...i had idlis and coconut chutney for breakfast..its 12 and am already feeling hungry..i went to the kitchen and put ma hands into every tins and cans i could to find some eatables..hurray!!!!!!!!!i found something...a packet of banana chips....yuck...being a health conscious freak i felt sad..the advertisement of fair and lovely came into ma mind and i said "I DON'T CARE" and  opened the pack and is enjoying it now..waise its not that bad!!!!!!!!
                            afterall its one of the specialities of ma gods own country right??lemme have some more...huh..tummy seems filled by now...thank u banana chips..u lovely rings put an end to ma hunger....

PREPARATIONS FOR THE DESTINATION..PART 1

(i had posted the original uncut version of ma preparations part 1.but its edited now as the censor board authorities asked me to..hehe..naa..its that ma friend advised me not to make ma blog cross the lines into vulgarity and therfore i have determined not to turn ma  blog into a controversial 1..so here i go with ma edited version..certified V/UA!!!!!!!!)
 


Ma preparation for the destination has begun..as a first part i had ma medical tests and service agreement signed..nothing irritates me like hospital environment and medical tests..but i had to cos the tests were mandatory...i went to the hospital and sat among 'expecting' mothers..went to the reception and enquired about the medical fitness tests..she gave me a list of all the tests 2 b done..and i was lead to the laboratory..smell of phenyl,antiseptics and medicines filled the air..i was given a bottle and commanded "go straight and turn right..use the bathroom"..i wondered what the hell she was blabbing about..blood test to be taken in a bathroom??..

i asked ma dad keeping the no:4 bottle in ma hand..dad laughed and said "its 4 urine test dear"..hmmmm okies i got it..i went in search of the bathroom..as soon as i found 1 room which was supposed to be the bathroom i yelled "godddddddddddddddddddddddddd"...the condition of the bathroom made me go yuck ..how could patients use it ??..the question haunted me..i finished that test and then was the blood test...i asked the attender who took the syringe "will it hurt?"..she smiled and said "a little"...a tight band was worn arond ma arms and den the syringe was inserted.hooooooooooooooo..it pained damn.......she took ma blood..and the sample was transferred..

i came to the reception again and the receptionist said "next is the chest xray".. i and dad had to go the x ray and scan lab..i have never  taken x ray in ma life so far..and it was ma first chance..i was asked to get in to the lab..i followed the attender..there were 3 other lady attenders inside..a girl asked me to stand near the wall..i thought may be this is the way x ray is taken usually..but i was completely wrong...

then was the fiery experience..i was asked to stand facing the wall where a machine was scanning me...and ma hands were twisted in such a way that it literally tortured me..i thought of Tracy Whitney from Sidney Sheldon's 'if tomorrow comes' and how she was treated in prison..i felt humiliated the same way..''take your breath and hold your breath" someone said.. i did the same...and there came "yup.its finished"..hooo i took ma arms from the wall and walked to the room and changed again..ma first xray experience!!!!
BP was checked next and at last all after hours of BRUTAL AND WEIRD tests  i received ma report saying that i am FIT for the same ..
YIPPIIIIIIIIII.............................................

Friday, January 08, 2010

HERO...

Sitting here listening to Enrique's 'HERO' i could feel the power of his words..

Would you dance if I asked you to dance?
Would you run and never look back
Would you cry if you saw me crying
Would you save my soul tonight?

Would you tremble if I touched your lips?
Would you laugh oh please tell me these
Now would you die for the one you love?
Hold me in your arms tonight?


I can be you hero baby
I can kiss away the pain
I will stand by you forever
You can take my breath away

Would you swear that you'll always be mine?
Would you lie would you run away
Am I in to deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care you're here tonight

I just want to hold you
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
Well I don't care you're here tonight


You can take my breath my breath away
I can be your hero .......

hmm...every girl would be wishing for a guy who utter these lines..to be her hero..to kiss away her pain..huh...my friends had a lot of heroic fascinations..some of them like 'he' to be like shahrukh in DDLJ saying "kyunki sayonara,bade bade sheharon mein aisi choti choti baatein hote rehte hein.." and also like "raj naam tu sunaa hi hoga.."...and i was crazy about salman during ma school days ...crazy for salman dancing to "oh oh jaane jaana.." and many others after mallu stars...how would be my real hero like??like Enrique who sings and cries for all the women in his life??huh..hmm...humming "lucky boy.. jaane kaun banega mera lucky boy???..."

LIKE MINDED...


R WAR ..i have been hearing about this for a while..war of religions..everybody says we are against religious discrimination bla bla bla..but will the same people indulge in activities of other religions or will they allow inter religious marriage for their kids?noooooooooooo...then why the useless words?yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy????how can INDIA be a secular country if words are meant to be only words?huh..

anyways i am so happy that i met a girl of ma kind..i can say like minded..same choice..same likes and dislikes..she doesnt believe in any religious crap like me..i wondered how could she be the next me!!!!!!!an i am so happy that i found her and we discuss a lot about religions and castes..i can say i am so amazed at this gal's attitude and am moved really..to know that there is someone other than you in this world just like you... u feel much stronger than before..and am feeling it now..

HERE'S THE PROOF AGAIN..


i am really fed up of ma senseless behaviour..i am laughing at myself now..i lost ma umbrella today..i remember well that i kept it in the bus seat..but when i had to leave i forgot to take it..and i knew very well that i kept it there itself and inspite of that i was searching for it and asking ma dad the same...he got angry at me asking if i was drunk or what..and i heard nice from parents for ma so called "responsibility"..another proof for ma stupidity..when am i going to learn?wont i ever grow up?

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

SUPER PRANKSTERS....

All of ma cousins have left...our house is silent again...until today house was on fire..with the laughter and cries of the so called small soldiers...i am not so good with kids..especially when they cry..i get irritated at their stupid questions like "what is this?","what is that?"..and i lose ma cool when they irritate me with their pranks...i call them "Lil monkeys"....
                                                              ma cousins are fortunately or unfortunately boys...real brats..they think they are the super heroes of this century...i have a hard time with them when they urge me again and again to indulge in stupid games with them and when they ask me to put "Taare Zameen Par" which i guess those guys have seen more than 34 times..yet they wish to see it again..strange guys!!!!...and what's more unbearable is that they make you also sit with them giving running commentary of all the dialogues in the film...and neither u could watch the movie nor you  understand what they are saying...
                                             Cartoons are their source of time pass..pokemon,tom and jerry,super man,scooby doo be doo,oh god, the list goes on and on...one of ma cousins can eat cartoon,watch cartoon and even sleep cartoon...hmm...and what was this year's special with them...great..yet another boring matter..CHESS!!!!!!!
                                           They are participating in the chess tournaments in their school..so have a chess board with them...and i was their partner with them in ma house..hooo..they doesn't allow me to play and keep on telling about the instructions and commands to be followed in chess,like how chess was originated,how Viswanathan Anand played in which way ,who was his co player bla bla..but i must say kids are more sharper these days..as its said "child is the father of man"
                                           They decode passwords i set in ma mob and commented "uff Ur code of security lock is so simple mausi!!!"...they almost made ma keyboard the worst it could ever be with their online games...and the most irritating part of them all.
when i will be surfing or browsing for some important topics and mails they do come slowly and restart ma system and run away..i get up and shout at them..and they run away laughing at me as if they have done something great..in spite of all those i miss those stupid cries and fights here now...huh..waiting for their next vacation..

Sunday, January 03, 2010

MANGALAM BHAGWAN VISHNU............


marriage 4 me was only meant to have a good time with ma cousins and friends and having splendid food and new dress..but the idea of marriage 4 me was a matter that i didn't ever think of..i ,my bro and ma parents sat in front of system preparing the matrimonial profile for the first time..and it required partner preference..and i was like "bhaiyya..put like this...."loyal faithful and loving.." "and he shouted "Abbey..u r hunting for a groom,and not for a dog!!!!!!"and i was like "okie. Ur wish" ..and i must say i really enjoyed all these fancy things for the first time..to watch photos in profiles and to read profile information when ma parents showed me those..and it was like into some social sites for me..as months passed by i got ma job and ma whole concentration got a twist...everyday when i get to home after ma job ma dad would be waiting for me with profile ids and photos which they liked..and i used to get really fed up with all these groom hunting....its lik i could hear ''om mangalam mangalam...."inside me like akshay in kambhakt ishq...

HANG OUT ..


Went to hang out with friends yesterday...our final year project has not received the certification from the authorities yet..the report had a lot of corrections to be made..the centre in which we went for formatting and aligning was crowded..we found a lot of time to share our memories in college..i and ma friends had a damn good time..i laughed alot that ma friends found it a hard time to manage me as i cant stop laughing 1 ce i start...really wished to have those memories back..but we were very happy that we are out of the college life which we found unbearable...

MARATHON RACE...


i feel that days are running fast this new year..cant even remember how it became 3rd of January 2010..i have loads of work to be completed in about 9 days.. and i don't have any idea how to manage all these..an am also gonna enter ma next job in this month..so quite a big deal 4 me i guess..